Saturday, August 25, 2007

A Prayer


Dear God,
Please don't let this fat, bald, low IQ, Shariah-supporting, power-aggrandizing, daddy's-boy-who-doesn't-know-anything-about-anything ride this wave to political power. Also, I know this might be a challenge, but since you are omnipotent, omnipresent and omniscient, you may be able to handle it: please remind Pakistanis that the same guy who's talking about respect for the constitution, democratic accountability and the rule of law sent his supporters to storm the goddamn Supreme Court last time he was Prime Minister. He also proclaimed himself Amir-ul-momineen. AMIR-UL-FUCKING-MOMINEEN!! For our western readers, amir-ul-momineen means "leader of the faithful" and connotes being more than simply a democratic leader of one country. It connotes, well, being the "leader of the faithful", the faithful of course being all Muslims, all around the world.

11 comments:

NB said...

Bro the will of the people is the will of the people. You either respect it or you dont. But as long as were not respecting it, here is my amended version of your prayer, (which is meant to add rather than replace, as I too hate Sharif).


Please don't let this ridiculously idiotic, self obsessed, meglomaniacal, hypocritical, power-aggrandizing, hubby's/daddy's-girl-who-doesn't-know-much-about-anything ride this wave to political power. Also, I know this might be a challenge, but since you are omnipotent, omnipresent and omniscient, you may be able to handle it: please remind Pakistanis that the same woman who's talking about respect for the constitution, democratic accountability and the rule of law joined her husband in pillaging the entire country and murdering a significant number of its citizens, and was then found guilty of corruption and money laundering by Swiss Courts for an amount definitley into the tens of millions of dollars if not the hundreds. Her absurd pronouncements have also included how she would inexplicably have been able to prevent 9/11 from happening had she been Prime Minister.

Anonymous said...

I did not know Nawaz Sharif was an Arab --- isn't the King of Saudi Arabia the Amir-ul-momineen?

Anonymous said...

Sharif's comment on Musharraf

"He doesn't show respect for the courts, or for the rule of law. He doesn't respect the parliament, doesn't respect the mandate of the people and doesn't care about the elected assembly," Sharif said.


Did the hair transplant damage the non-functioning brain this idiot has? He could just as well be talking about himself right up to October 12, 1999.

Ahsan said...

i hereby submit that pakistan's name should be changed to ironicistan.

Adeel said...

AMEN! (nobody said that at the end of the prayer)...

Asad said...

you guys are seriously the most pessimistic, glass-is-empty-and-shattered people i know.

if one was to accept, for a moment, the imperfections (take a deep breath before crying 'understatement') of both sharif and bhutto, perhaps you could focus on something Rs.5 has discussed before...

... its important for this country to revert to democratic government, as flawed as Pakistan's own may be. Perhaps NS or BB become PM, perhaps they don't, but at least we'll start putting the power back in the peoples' hands.

And if they are really as bad as you say, then bear in mind;
'Democracy, despite all its (and the democrats', no doubt) faults, presents opportunities for progression.'
does that sound familiar?

so how's this for a prayer;
Dear God, don't let another General parade as a politician. Give the people of Pakistan the opportunity to vote in a real election, and then, let them learn from their mistakes. Let them learn what it means to be accountable as a voter, the same way politicians should learn to be accountable to them.
And then... please God, tell the guys at Rs.5 to cheer the fuck up, and acknowledge the good that this country is trying to do for itself'.

NB said...

Fair enough. Amen to that.

Ahsan said...

asad: this is why i hate archives. my own words end up being used against me.

in truth, though i appreciate the comment, i would say the two positions are not mutually exclusive. they are simply temporally distinctive. the glass is very much full when one considers the democratic process getting a start, however halted and bumpy it may be. however, my post was more in relation to what happens AFTER the elections (i.e. who wins them). i suppose it would be accurate to say that the glass is 3/4ths full insofar as having elections are concerned and very much half full (for me) insofar as the product of those elections are concerned. but like i said, i see where you're coming from. occasionally we here on rs.5 have to be reminded not everything is crap.

asim said...

hey ahsan, i love the guerilla nature of this website but just a couple of suggestions. one: it's hard to read text against black. you're better off making a grey background with black text or something. or just increase the text size? two: if you cuss less, you might win over more opinions. love the passion though... kudos!

asad said...

ill take 'temporarily distinctive' over 'military dictatorship' any day.

Ahsan said...

cuss less? NEVER!

nb, pls make note of the "hard to read" point. he is not the first to say this. perhaps a change is in order.