Saturday, December 15, 2007

Of Manifestos, Alliteration, And Acronyms

So party manifestos have been all the rage in the last couple of days. First, Benazir's PPP came out with their 5 E's manifesto, aimed at employment, education, energy, environment and equality. Not to be outdone in the alliteration sweepstakes, the PML-Q responded with their 5 D's manifesto which entailed democracy, development, devolution, diversity and defence. Nawaz Sharif and the PML-N decided to blaze their own trail, leaving the alliterations in their dust and instead turning to acronyms that spell real words. Check out what they came up with:

Restoration of the judiciary, democracy and 1973 constitution
Elimination of military's rule in politics
Security of life and property of the people
Tolerant and pluralistic society
Overall national reconciliation and institutional development
Relief for the poor through poverty alleviation
Employment, education, and health facilities for the citizens

RESTORE. For some reason, I couldn't stop laughing when I read this one. Did someone forget to tell good old Sharif bhai that in acronyms, you can't have each letter representing an entire goddamn sentence? Unbelievable.

For my mind, these manifestos are Royally and Excruciatingly Terrible Attempts at Replacing Dictatorship with Everlasting Democracy, or RETARDED.

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