Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Why is the Hindu-Jewish nexus out to destroy my peace?

"India has successfully launched an Israeli spy satellite into orbit, officials at the Sriharikota space station in southern India say. The Israeli press is reporting that the satellite will improve Israel's ability to monitor Iran's military activities". (BBC)

Excellent, this is exactly what we need. I'm sure someone can talk about the geopolitical significance of this but I'm more concerned about the fact that I've got a family get-together today and this news is going to make my life just fucking groovy!

I can just imagine some dumbass mentioning the Zionist Conspiracy within some innane context (the same Jewish assassin killed Liaquat Ali Khan and Benazir, he lives near the park) and of course once this happens all subsequent conversation will revolve around the Hindu-Jewish-American Axis, and how they all want to destroy Pakistan.

This is of course all quite true. You see the Great Satan has distracted Pakistan with this hootenanny war on terror and is making Pakistan fight its own people whereas the 'real' Al-Qaeda members are all CIA Agents operating out of Colorado, which is incidentally where Osama Bin Laden is stationed. All the while Israel wants to take over our nuclear devices as it feels threatened by the 'Islamic Bomb' and America will aid Israel in taking over / destroying these, our national assets (defunct Chinese nuclear devices made using stolen German centrifuges, placed on dodgy North Korean missiles). And of course India wants to annihilate Pakistan as the Hindus hate Muslims - do you not remember Gujrat?

Oh and to top this all of, Gordon Brown wants to bestow His Majesty Sachin "Visa Power" Tendulkar with a knighthood. Fucking excellent.

9 comments:

Asad said...

man... you *really* don't like those family get-togethers, huh?

Ahsan said...

aks, just for curiosity's sake, does anyone in your family actually read the blog?

AKS said...

Its one of those once a few years massive event with third / fourth cousins et al, and people from the old neighbourhoods thown in for good measure; so even if people read this they'll probably be thinking that the dumbass is anyone but them!

Green Views said...

nasty man....pepper on the tongue...habenaros....

http://moinansari.wordpress.com

Asad said...

so... how'd the get-together go?

Ahsan said...

i think the fact that aks is yet to return speaks volumes.

Asad said...

perhaps the Zionists got him?

AKS said...

hahaha...no the Zionists didn't get me, just looking at the pile of work at my desk that I've been avoiding makes me hope they had.

The dinner wasn't too bad as the conversation didn't really get past inflation, food shortages and a return to ration cards (they begin feb 8 woohoo!).

Anonymous said...

Pakistan test fires neuclear capable missile... who is destroying peace now ??