Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Hameed Gul Opens Mouth, Bullshit Follows

Oh, dear. Please watch this interview of our erstwhile intelligence chief with Fareed Zakaria. I love Fareed's "I don't know whether to be shocked this guy is saying this shit or excited that I'm getting this big a scoop for my show" expression.

My favorite lines:

"I think this is a frame-up, a total frame-up." Yes, well, if something's going to be a frame-up, it might as well be a total frame-up.

"I'm like an open book." Great, so in addition to complete stupidity, you have another thing in common with Sarah Palin.

"This is preposterous, this is wrong, this is fallacious." Someone's gone to town on shift+F7 just before their interview on international television, yes?

"I have all my sympathies for India." Oh dear Lord, where to start? You know what? Forget it.

"Obviously it [the Mumbai attacks] is an inside job." Obviously!

"I have no linkages with [Lashkar-e-Taiba]." In response to a question on whether the ISI has formal or informal links with LeT. That, my friend, is known as a Freudian slip.

"9/11's full evidence has still not emerged, it is still shrouded in mystery." I don't even have a comment for this one.

"Americans have still to set up a proper commission, inquiry commission into this event." It's too bad they wasted the name of the "9/11 commission" on something else then.

"It was the Zionists, the Neocons, they have done it [9/11], it was an inside job." So many inside jobs! How does one keep track of all this? I suppose it helps being an intelligence chief because, by definition, you must be pretty intelligent to get to that position.



Anonymous said...

Yeah keep disparaging your own Ahsan. I'd like to see you being this critical about a Westerner. Shame on you.

AKS said...

@ Ahsan

Eid Mubarak. Great find. Hamid Gul should be made to clean up all the shit that's left over after Qurbani; I think that's a better use for his talents - peddling shit.

@ Anon

I'm mustering all my self restraint to not say anything offensive here.

How the hell do you know we aren't critical of 'westerners?' And why should we be more critical of them? I live in Pakistan and I find it more appropriate to critique one of 'our own' than some idiot I hardly know.

Why the fuck shouldn't we be critical of this turd pastry? He incites hatred, preaches violence and doesn't care when people die as long as they die for the 'greater good' (as defined by him).

Ahsan said...


Consider me shamed.

Anonymous said...

haha turd pastry

Raza said...

The man's dicklessness aside... that might be the worst shirt/tie combination EVER.

Anonymous said...

@anon 08:24

Don't you know? People like Ahsan LOVE masturbating off dissing their own people while they suck on Westerner's dicks.

It's called an inferiority complex - one which they try to mitigate their whole lives leading to quite predictable blogs like this one!

'He incites hatred, preaches violence and doesn't care when people die as long as they die for the 'greater good''

- sounds a lot like Obama's (or any American government's) plan for Afghanistan and Pakistan and his lovely chief of staff's plans for Palestine.

- Actually also sounds like what every single Pakistani leader in the past has also done. According to your definition Jinnah was a turd pastry too (I agree).

Why is Ahsan's head stuck up Obama's ass then? OR maybe your head is stuck up Ahsan's? Or maybe you guys are hypocrites. Or you'd be hypocrites if you believed in something in the first place and then shirked on it, but don't believe in anything so are wannabe hypocrites? I don't know. Complex thing this, figuring who the real turd pastries are. Gul, Ahsan, AKS and co - all in the same boat.

AKS said...

@ Anon 348

I must give credit to NB for coming up with the term 'turd pastry.'

@ Anon 1131

Glory be to you. I accept the error of my ways, thanks for opening my eyes. You surely must have a big... brain.

Death to Israel! Death to America! See, I've already gotten rid of my inferiority complex already, and am channeling all my energies towards positive things rather wasting my time by critiquing the social space that I inhabit.

Desi said...


Am impressed some Pakistanis actually deigned to anal-yze Hamid Gul's [verbal] diahorrea without losing perspective or breaking [wind] into AoAs.

Good for ya. Your country needs more of that kinda sanity and resolve.

a Yindian

anoop said...

This guy is ex-ISI for godsakes.. God help you pakistanis..