Thursday, June 25, 2009

Breaking News: Michael Jackson Is Dead (Updated Below)

Holy shit. Do you guys believe this?

UPDATE: You know who I feel really bad for? Farah Fawcett and her family. Normally when a public figure as important/popular/seminal as Fawcett dies, there are tributes and celebrations to their life and career. Right now, no one gives a rat's ass.

UPDATE II: A friend and I were discussing this: whose death would be/is bigger news: Michael Jackson's or Bono's? We both agreed on the choice, but I won't tell you which one we agreed upon. What do you guys think?

UPDATE III: Another question for you guys. What is the list of all people -- not just entertainers -- whose natural death (i.e. no assassinations or murders allowed) would be bigger than Michael Jackson's death? Keep in mind that his passing basically caused the internet to slow down. Let me say that again -- the internet slowed down. Not one website. The entire bloody thing. Here's my list, in no particular order:

1. Barack Obama
2. Nelson Mandela
3. George W. Bush
4. Michael Jordan

People who I'm split on but sort of leaning toward Michael Jackson:

1. Paul McCartney
2. Madonna
3. Dalai Lama
4. Pele

I'm sure I'm leaving off some people. Thoughts?


Asfandyar said...

Farah Fawcett is dead too!? Wasn't she supposed to be getting married?

Hell. Still can't completely process Wacko Jacko's death.

Anonymous said...

i am so sad ! =(

Augustus Fink-Nottle said...

MJ's death bigger news by far. He was a bigger icon in his time than Bono has been and if you read the news almost all refer to him as the King of Pop. Still.

Augustus Fink-Nottle said...

How about this one? Who would you think of first when someone said MJ, Jackson or Jordan? When I heard MJ was dead, my first thoughts went to Jordan.

sana said...

i always thought he would die of skin cancer or something and then he has a heart attack!unbelievable!!

p.s i would be really really sad if bono dies.

Anonymous said...

When someone says MJ...I think of mary-jane: spidermans gf!

beyond said...

very sad indeed.bono is great but as long as the biggest news is concerned,it is,for sure,MJ.people living in slums know about MJ,but might have never heard about bono or U2.

Anonymous said...

people living in interior sindh have heard of and danced to michael jackson's music. I doubt any of them have ever heard of U2 much less Bono. Sorry man. MJ takes this one by a mile

Kalsoom said...


As much as I love U2, Michael Jackson is far more universal. I still remember my khala who lived in Thailand in the 90s went to the MJ concert and said it was packed to the max with people screaming, "My-koon Jacksooon!"

NB said...

I feel very sad about My Koon. Poor guy. He was in debt too.

dbldot said...

You are missing Osama Bin Laden. I can see the internet slowing down on that one.

Anonymous said...

I'd put Muhammad Ali in that list too

AKS said...


There'll surely be a lot more dignitaries mourning Bono's death but MJ is on a different planet in terms of popularity. Have you even seen an desi Bono impersonator? Youtube is full of desi Michael Jackson impersonators.

As for the list, are we supposing the response if these fell dead tomorrow? Because 10 years from now not that many people would care about Bush's death.

Osama Bin Laden or Obama would probably top the chart. Lets not forget the Queen of England either. Leonado DiCaprio and Kate Winslet would also be up there - the Indians, Pakistanis and Chinese all share a strange love for Titanic.

Ahsan said...

Yeah, good point on the Muhammad Ali and OBL points.


Good point on the now vs. 10 yrs thing. But won't the same thing apply to OBL? I mean when Pol Pot died a few yrs ago, it didn't really cause that much of a ruckus. And he killed, quite literally, a thousand times as many people as OBL.

Finally, there's no WAY that Leo or Kate Winslut would have a more important death than MJ. They're not even on the same planet. Queen of England? Maybe, maybe not.

Kalsoom said...


You just brought up a horrid memory. My freshman roommate in university was Korean, and she ADORED Titanic. So much so that she would leave the Korean version of "My Heart Will Go On" on repeat until I felt like clawing my eyes out. Yeah. We didn't get along very well.

bubs said...

Music now is so segregated by genre, age etc that no current pop star has the cachet of Michael Jackson. The only ones who could come close are those who were huge at the same as Michael Jackson. That would be Madonna, Bruce Springsteen and Prince.

Age also has a lot to do with it. Michael Jackson was 50. Nelson Mandela is like 90 or something. There will be an outpouring of grief when Mandela dies but the shock factor would be absent.

And I would put Bill Clinton on the list above George W Bush.

snikometer said...

David Beckham would be up there. Also, I thought Benazir didn't do too badly in the public-outpour-of-grief-and-media-coverage-around-the-world department. Question is, would Sonia Gandhi top BB?

bubs said...

Scratch what I said above. No one's death will be bigger than MJ's. The freaking Sindh Assembly had a minute's silence to observe his passing.

Ali K. said...

Pele!!!! I think not. Maradona would have a much bigger impact than pele. Actually the footballer whose death would have the biggest impact is probably beckham.

ahad said...

I think the only other person that can top MJ is Obama. Africans and South Americans won't give a rat's ass about OBL.

No one has the universal appeal of MJ in the music industry, even Madonna (the most internationally-popular female crooner of all time), the boss (which desis know about him?) or Prince (half the people don't even like him).

A lot of young people don't even know about Mandela, let alone look him up.

There would a lot of despondence over Muhammad Ali's passing away but grinding the internet to a slow? He wasn't freakish enough.

karachikhatmal said...

if brianna banks or pamela anderson dies in a sex tape, the internet wouldn't slow down, it would implode.

Spark said...

What about Queen Elizabeth II? Diana's death was huge (although she was probably bigger than QE)--I remember watching the funeral on TV as a kid. It must have been broadcast worldwide--of course I'm sure MJ's will be as well.

I'd say Beckham, Mandela, Obama, and Madonna could at least equal MJ. Especially if it were a sort of freak heart attack thing. On the UBL thing--there'd be speculation if it were real or fake and the potential lack of a public funeral would tone down the coverage quicker.

SZM said...

I seriously don't think there is anyone as popular as MJ.
I wish i'd gotten a chance to see him in concert.

AKS said...

Karachi Khatmal:

Thank you for your comment.

Like a complete idiot I just ended up googling Briana Banks without realizing that she may be a pornstar. Worse, there's no way of deleting history on the work computer and all internet usage is logged! I now feel like a dirty fucker who watches porn at work.

By the way, its astonishing how much porn people download at the office. We keep restricting access, and these horndogs keep finding a way to tunnel through. Thankfully, they don't really watch the porn at work, just download it and take it homw (I'm guessing) which is why we've disabled USB drives on a large number of PCs.

This is one horny country.

Anonymous said...

Michael Jordan? Paul McCartney? Are you kidding me?

The only person on that list who would cause a bigger shock by dying would be Obama.. no one else comes even close