Monday, June 22, 2009

Time To Get Rid Of 'Breaking News'

Pakistani news channels have an affinity for breaking news tickers that is beyond ridiculous. It is 12.47 a.m. and ARY News is breaking the news on its flashy news ticker:

"President Zardari has telephone conversation with Angelina Jolie."

Who cares?

The same channel has shown a clip of Bilawal B. Zardari giving a speech at a congregation commemorating Benazir's birthday. He's trying really hard to sound impassioned and fiery, he comes out looking really awkward; poor guy has huge shoes to fill and just doesn't seem to have the qualities that made his mother and grandfather so successful.

The channel is now interviewing MoYo and he's trying his best not to sound like a 'patriot' rather than a greedy moron, I'm not too sure that he succeeds.


Ahsan said...

You know who's really happy that Jolie has to talk to Zardari? Jennifer Aniston.

Naqiya said...


how the hell do you know about the angelina vs. jennifer aniston drama but have no idea where "luke, i am your father" is from?? please explain this selective interest in pop culture. 5-8 pages, double spaced, will do.

Ahsan said...


Haha I wish I could, but I don't have the time at present. All I'll say is that the Aniston-Pitt-Jolie issue has proven endlessly fascinating for me. The other thing was from a movie from decades ago. Plus, wouldn't it be fair to say that the APJ issue was the biggest celebrity scandal/story of this decade?

bubs said...

Wow, there's someone who hasn't seen Star Wars. And Naqiya, for full effect you have to say, "No, Luke, I am your father," and stress heavily on the I (not the am as lots of people tend to do).

snaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa said...

at least you're not exposed to Sky News' News "Alerts". Politician to have news conference. About to have news conference. News conference late. News conference to start. News conference started etc.

Naqiya said...


in my many interactions with star wars nerds (like the guys who cried at the end of episode 3, even though they were pissed it sucked) not a single one said the "no"

and of course i stress on the "i"! its not like i'm like someone who has never seen the ahsan!

ahsan on your next trip here we are doing a star wars marathon. only episodes 4,5,6 though, the rest kinda sucked. although i;m sure i;m going to get shit from your readers for saying that

Anonymous said...

Hmmm.. I wonder what they spoke about.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, and at 1 o'clock in the night no less

Junaid Masood said...

Our news channels are fond of blowing everything out of proportions. Fact. :)

Naqiya said...

for ahsan: since you are so invested in this -

Naqiya said...

for ahsan: since you are so invested in this -

Ahsan said...

Haha thank you for that link Naqiya. This was my favorite part:

"Of course, all these rumours may be utter bobbins."

At least they admit it.

By the way, how great would it be if Brad Pitt leaves AJ for Megan Fox?