Tuesday, September 08, 2009

A Gift to Conspiracy Theorists

Ahsan will probably send me a characteristically irate email for stoking the fires of ignorance, but I can't resist. 

In his book 'Profiles of Intelligence', former ISI officer and Sitara-i-Imtiaz recipient Brigadier Syed A.I. Tirmazi writes:
"Next on the list [of countries that Tirmazi beleives the United States wants to impose it's will upon] is Yemen. Yemen not only supported Saddam during the Gulf Crisis but also has its geo strategical importance as it borders Saudi Arabia, controls the Red Sea at Bab-ul-Mandab, and new oil fields have been discovered in Jazen Area in Northern Yemen. There being no economic problems in Yemen, Americans are attempting to employ the 'Islamic Card' there. The CIA has infiltrated the Ikhwan-ul-Muslimeen (Muslim Brotherhood) and have supported them to win a few seats in the cabinet."

"Usameh Ben Laden, a Saudi national of Yemeni origin, has been selected to direct the CIA operations there. It would be recalled that Usameh, who establsihed Qaada and controlled all the Arab mercenaries in Peshawar- Afghanistan and played a mysterious role in the Jalalabad battle of 1989, has reappeared in Peshawar after an absence of two years. Reportedly he is arranging to shift his Qaada and the Arab mercenaries to Yemen to fight a holy war against h e Yemen Regime, As soon as he reaches there and established his Qaada we will see a CIA instigated insurgency between the troops of Sheikh Sindani and Arab mercenaries led by Usameh."

"Equally under threat is the regime of General Omar-al-Bashir of Sudan. Usameh has made a number of visits to Sudan too and has offered his services, funds and fighters to help President Bashir to fight Christian insurgents of South Sudan. President Bashir knows that he had sided with Iraq during the Gulf War and that Egypt and Israel are already helping Colonel Garang against him, therefore, Usameh's offer is an attempt to infiltrate the fight column in Sudan. He there fore declined the 'good offer'. However, he cannot go very far because for implementation of the New World Order, both Sudan and Bashir have to be sorted out, it is only a matter of time."
Two points:

1. The paragraphs quoted above may not fully demonstrate this, but Tirmazi's  book is written in a style that does not really reflect well upon its credibility. And that is putting it mildly.

2. There is currently no shortage of people clamouring that 9/11 was an 'inside job' and that Bin Laden was/is an agent for the CIA.

Having set out the unremarkable aspects of Tirmazi's account, the reason it is somewhat noteworthy is because the book was published in 1995. Tirmazi was therefore asserting that Bin Laden was a CIA operative well before 9/11 or Kenya, at a time when he was relatively anonymous. Moreover, Tirmazi's suspicions are aroused not in relation to Bin Laden being a CIA created bogeyman who enables/justifies American military intervention, but rather in relation to what he perceives to be Bin Laden's direct efforts to overthrow regimes in opposition to America's 'New World Order'. Either way, he is probably amongst the earliest, and the most consistent proponents of the 'Bin Laden is a CIA puppet' conspiracy theorists.

Tirmazi's account is also noteworthy for his hilarious passage on Dr. Andrew V Corry, a previous US Counsel  General who was based in Lahore:
"It is interesting to note that Dr. Corry, a chronic bachelor, was a passive homosexual. When he would get the urge and had not arranged for a partner, he would go crazy. He would take off his clothes, bend over and even beg his domestic servant or his driver to satisfy his perversion. His driver Ashraf, mostly close at hand, was not in an enviable position but financially he gained a lot. ISI could have exposed Dr Corry's perversion but our moral stands, decency and ethics dissuaded us."
Doesn't sound passive at all. And very kind indeed of the ISI not to expose Dr.Corry in the way that Brig Tirmazi exposed him. 

I feel bad for Ashraf actually. He was just a pawn in this Great Passive Homosexual Game. He certainly did not deserve to be outed by Brig Tirmazi's lame non-attempt at discretion. I hope he sued for libel.


FZ said...

nice, and I thought the Sudan story was bringing out the crazies...going to get some popcorn, brb.

Butterscotch said...

This mr ashraf probably acquired a new identity hence a legend was born, the greatest ever Pakistani conspiracy theorist a certain zaid hamid.
During my research on illuminatis, I came across this absolutely hilarious documentary where the entire British monarchy was declared a hybrid alien group with prince William all set to rule the human race defying imam mehdi in the last clash of civilization.
I am so happy to be living in UK ;)

adeel said...

>passive homosexual
Perhaps Brig. Tirmizi was implying that Corry was usually on the receiving end of the action.

Ahsan said...

The "morals stands, decency and ethics" line on the ISI killed me. Just absolutely sliced-my-head-off-with-a-machete killed me.

Minerva said...


There's one surefire way I know Yemen is not going to be invaded or be a part of some big conspiracy theory.

These people hate change.

Jaydev,India said...

"moral,ethical standards" pangs line of Brig.Tirmizi about ISI is definitely a classic... ;-)

If CIA could run a brothel to test mind-control chemicals on customers..in the MK-ULTRA programme..there is not limit what more grisly intel agencies could do..

ps:US-Saudi Arabia-Egypt is engaged in battle against Shia rebels in Yemen who are proxies of Iran.


takhalus said...

that is some serious abuse of human reason and the english language going on..

NB said...


I don't think Prince William is a match for Prince Harry, let alone the Mahdi. Would love to watch that documentary though. Is it on Youtube by any chance?


I honestly didn't even think of that. So what would a 'giver' be called? A 'proactive homosexual'? Vaisay you cant really get more proactive than getting naked and begging your driver. Clearly Tirmizi has his classifications wrong.


Yeah i love that bit. The ISI really is very kind and gentle , once you get to know it.


I dont follow...


Thanks for the link, very informative.


Language wise, I think I've actually quoted some of the more coherent paragraphs in the book.